Saturday Morning with Cass

Ted didn’t call today.  I’m pretty upset about that, even though I guess he might have a hangover or be busy or whatever.  But I still wish he’d call me.

This morning, I told Cassie about a lot of things, including Ted, well, most of Ted, and all about this blog.  I think she’s a bit surprised by Ted, but she’s like not going to say too too much until we see how it goes.  The blog, on the other hand, she thinks that this is like a real monumentally stupid idea.

I respect Cassie’s opinion.  She’s really really smart, but I don’t agree with her on this one and I think  I’m going to keep writing.  Cassie’s always convinced there’s a conspiracy in everything, and she painted this picture for me of like hundreds of guys drooling over every word I wrote and waiting for the day to expose me as a fraud when I eventually go public as a superheroine.  No offense to Cassie, but I think she’s off on this one.

For one thing, I don’t really think this blog is all that sexy.  I think about sex a lot, granted, what girl doesn’t?  And if every teenage girl’s diary was all that exciting, wouldn’t they all be besieged by horndogs?  Seriously, if a guy’s gonna get aroused by what I write, I’m almost flattered.  Way more flattered than if he gets a woody from looking at my body, anyway.  The bod’s not something I’m responsible for, it just is.  This blog, this is like something I work hard at and if a guy likes it, maybe its like he likes the real me, not just the package I’m in.   Ya know, it might even be cool to meet guys like that, knowing that its not just the way I look that makes him like me.

And for another thing, I honestly don’t think anyone reads my little diary here.  I mean, I’ve posted like seven things, and the only comment I got was some spam thing about financial investments that I’m sure was put there by some computer.  Its not like I’m letting the whole world know about me, and besides, I didn’t even put down what state I live in.

Now, granted the whole idea of leaving an electronic record of my thoughts as a teenager which could be used against me later is a little disturbing.  But who am I kidding?  I may save the world or something someday, but there’s no way I’m ever going to get elected to public office or anything.  Frankly, the only way I think I’d really get into trouble with this blog is if one of my friends, or heaven forbid, a guy like Ted was to get ahold of it and take offense to what I’d said.  Not likely, given that no one else is reading it.

Cassie’s one of the very few human beings who knows all about me, and I can’t tell you how much I value her opinions, but on this issue, I think she’s wrong.  

Now, what Cassie is probably right about, on the other hand, is that I have like absolutely no business playing on the basketball game.  The risk of me screwing up is just way too big, and she also made a real point about it not being fair.  I’m still chewing on it, but I think I’m going to find a way to get off the team.  I don’t want to just quit, but I’m also not what sure what it would take for the coach to throw me off, either.  I’m gonna think about this some more, though, later on, after I go play in his pickup game thing.  That ought to be a hoot, anyway.  Sweaty guys pushing and shoving and pressing up against me.  What more could a girl want?  A little phone call from a not so sweaty guy, maybe, would be nice.